A stranger passing through
you drew it out of me
your shining brown eyes
all there was for me to
see.
Love bubbled over
spilled over my face
and I didn’t stand up
for it
- oh shame, oh
self-disgrace.
Once I was giving
sharing freely of what I
had in store
confident that there was
plenitude, forever more.
Loving just for loving’s
sake
for the joy of being free
and – ulitmately,
uniquely – me.
Then I got rebuked,
harshly refused, put down
And subsequently
- why, to this day I don’t
know –
let shining love down.
Abandoned out of fear
of being hurt again to the
core
that which I no longer
believed
to be a safely trodden
shore.
Barren I fell.
Isolated I got.
Tied my soul down with
iron bonds
stayed firmly in one spot.
Now rocks, they might
agree
to being treated like
that.
With my soul however,
ill that treatment sat.
It longed to be free,
free to feel love’s
gentle waves,
lapping against the shore.
As I refused myself that,
and as time went on by,
the tide rose, and rose,
its furious breakers
forcefully
beating my heart sore.
Sine then there have been
many changes.
I learnt to give my spirit
rein,
and pressure levelled off.
I shan’t now here in
details go,
for fear that you might
scoff.
Just let it be said,
the changes were good,
and I am now in a wholly
different mood.
However,
I’m sorry to recognize
my love isn’t yet set
free.
It still strains against
the
boundaries that fear
instilled
in me.
But love will not be tied
down fast
love needs to be free.
And so I go on longing
for what in your face I
see.
Go on longing for a loving
touch,
and yet I deeply know
that until I get my
courage up
it won’t happen as such.
Inspired by Karl Steyaert,
Findhorn
